Anxiety Journal 3 - Wishes V/s Work!



Today's prompt asks me to list the things that I do daily, as well as the things that I wish I could do every day. It also asks me to reflect on what is holding me back, and what steps I can take in the near future to do the things I wish to do.

Here is the list of the things that I do every day:

Silence - A good part of my day goes by in remaining silent and listening to the sounds around me. I live in an apartment where there are always some kinds of sounds coming up. The lift moves up and down the whole day and its sound is much familiar to me now. Early morning, the caretaker of the building sweeps the compound of the same. The sound of the broom swishing over the road and dried leaves scraping as they get swept, is something that I have become attuned to ever since I shifted to the new home. Most of the kids in the building attend the same school inside the colony. From many homes, I can hear the sound of harried parents urging their kids to hurry up. It is contrasting really - my own silence and the sounds surrounding me. I find it very comforting.

Off late I have started the practice of journaling. It is immensely relieving to provide an outlet to all those thoughts that wreak havoc in the mind, specially in the evenings. Journaling helps me to empty my mind of all negative thoughts and provides an outlet to express myself through blogs. This practice has become the most important ritual of self-care for the day.

I read a lot. Once my household chores are completed, I resort to reading and writing, but more of the former. Currently I am reading a series which is highly addictive. There are 49 books in the series and I am currently reading the 38th one. It is going to be so difficult to switch gears once I finish this series. All the characters in the books feel like family now. 

The things that I wish I could do every day far outweigh the things that I am doing daily. Here is a list of the former:

I wish I could meditate every day. I have tried many times but I am unable to concentrate. I have read so many articles advocating the benefits of meditation but still I am unable to do it. Perhaps the inability to stay still and do nothing for sometime comes as a side-effect of the constant need to keep doing something always. 

I wish I could do some physical exercises every day. I had begun walking in the evenings but the kid's exams crept up and I have not been able to keep up with the walks - neither in the morning, nor in the evenings. I live in a beautiful colony that has abundance of trees and greenery and the walks were a visual and audio treats, what with the numerous types of birds colonizing the trees and spreading their chatter throughout the colony. I wish I could have a regular and definite time for keeping up with my walks. 

I wish I could write more every day. I write, but it is far lesser than what I would like to. Every night, the author in me dishes out criticism for having not put in my best efforts to write and wasted precious time. For some reason, the capacity to write is limited to a few words every day. I would like to increase the word count as well as the time set for writing. There is a novel whose outline I have penned down but haven't begun working on the same, even though almost a month has gone by since I wrote the first blueprints. I wish I could start on the same soon!

I wish I could practice more mindfulness. The ability to focus on one given task at a time has become a necessity today where we are surrounded by hundreds of distractions. Perhaps if I stop multi-tasking and revert to only one task at a time, I will be able to do it mindfully.

This prompt has brought in a realization. What we wish we could do, is far more than what we are really doing. By identifying the things that are holding us back and taking tiny steps every day towards self-improvement, we will be able to do everything we have ever dreamed of. 

Please let me know how this blog has helped you. I would also love to hear your take on this prompt. Have a regret-free and blessed existence!

Comments

  1. Latha PrakashNovember 18, 2023 at 5:56 AM

    I wish I could meditate and write more too. My writing has hit a wall. And words are stuck in my mind. Hopefully this write up of urs will help me reflect on my day.

    ReplyDelete

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